Huge Calculator

Does anyone else think that those really big calculators are ridiculous? What is it about the calculator that makes it think it can shrug off the downhill tumble that is technological betterment?

In an age where cell phones are smaller, thinner, and shinier than forks this defiant slave to long division stands still. Like your 268 pound neighbor in his running shorts bending over to pick up his keys. It seems to be bragging, "look at me I am obnoxiously huge, pay heed!"

I have come up with a plan. Next time you see someone using one of those huge calculators, simply go up to them and start singing "smooth operator", but instead of the real words substitute "Huge Calculator", if that doesn't work take them to see your neighbor drop his keys.

note: my cell phone has a calculator in it. It also has the ability to take a picture of my 268 pound neighbor. Pay heed, the downhill tumble will be triggered by convenience. I'll call you and we can talk about it.